Drowning in this land of ignorance.



Ectopic pregnancy pamphlet

Ectopic pregnancy Pamphlet

King Edwards memorial hospital is where I had my son in 2007. It is the public womens hospital in Perth, Western Australia. I was online searching to see if anyone in Australia distributes an information brochure on Ectopic pregnancy. I found this one pictured here, you can see it too if you follow the link underneath. Most of the pdf documents I have found online have been of American origin.Produced by the obstetric and gynaecology associations.What I found most interesting was the contact information for women who required assistance with their ectopic pregnancy.

Whilst this hospital is situated in Australia, and is staffed by some of the worlds most honourable obstetricians and gynaecologists it fails to mention any support network available in Australia other than the usual mental health, pastoral care and social workers which are all so daunting and confrontational in there own right. It also says the statistics are 1 in 80 pregnancies in Australia are ectopic, these figures were updated in 2008. 

When mentioning support it lists Sids kids Australia. Which I associate with sudden infant death syndrome which doesnt seem particularly relevant to an ectopic pregnancy for a number of reasons which i wont go into now because of the obviousness of it. For online support it has two links to two websites in the UK. For some reason this astounds me,  one is the ectopic pregnancy trust which raises funds in the UK to help practitioners and women in the UK be more aware of ectopic pregnancy in the UK! The other site is the miscarriage association in the you guessed it...UK. Im not anti UK (The queen is on all of our money and I lurve money..haha) but I am anti Telstra haha and the cost of ringing a hotline to speak with someone who knows exactly what you need to hear as opposed to some generic form of social worker talk in the UK is going to cost you an arm and a leg. 

I would have thought 1 in 80 pregnancies being an ectopic would be considered quite common.Its not an extremely rare condition however I have read and heard time and time again that women did not know what it was until they were diagnosed with one, and its deadly. Its not just uncomfortable and sad it is deadly!

I wish I was in a position to do something about this. In my research I have found a common thread amongst women who have suffered from an ectopic pregnancy, emotional pandemonium, irrational fear, and complete isolation. There is so little support here in Australia for ectopic pregnancies, and I dont understand it. I have blogged about my experience with a GP i wont call him mine because I am never going back however when I asked him for help with my emotional and mental health he told me to look up psychologist in the yellow pages. How I refrained from slapping him across the face with my sweaty shaking palm I have no idea.But anyway.........does anyone have any suggestions on how to combat this? Can one person change this?

My husband told me a story recently on how one man brought down almost an entire community single handedly.

"Its true honey, One man can make a difference."





It all depends on how badly we want it, and when I say we  I mean this silent community of women effected by this. Has everyone in Australia that has suffered from an ectopic gone and got an engineering degree and built a bridge to get over it?  or eaten some cement and hardened the hell up or maybe got 50 cents and rung someone who cares.

Let me know how you dealt with it or are dealing with it or how you plan to deal with it if you arent right now ! If you are from another country, let me know what sort of support you have received or have on offer and if it is received well.

Think pink

Janey

Life after an ectopic pregnancy support group in Australia

This article talks about the trials and tribulations of women in Ireland who have experienced ectopic pregnancies and decided to start their own charity to raise awareness for other Irish women.

Life after an ectopic pregnancy

I'm looking for Australian women who have experienced ectopic pregnancy in their lifetime. So that we can

 1. Create a support network for each other (its kind of embarrassing, I'm stalking the US and UK forums at the moment due to a total lack of response from anyone in the Australian forums. I'm sick of feeling alone in this guys.

2. Create awareness of ectopic pregnancy and the dangers it presents through written and verbal publications.
I noticed that I received no written information whilst i was at and when i left the hospital. At my check ups i was checked physically, hows my pain, how are my staples, am i eating , bowel movements etc....but no "how are you doing emotionally, how is your support network going, what are you doing to heal yourself emotionally.

These are the questions we should be asking women when they confront the seriousness and reality of "dancing with death."


3. Provide a safe place for people to turn to and vent their emotions in an environment that is present when they are experiencing, loss, fear, anger, resentment, guilt, loneliness, frustration and every emotion that comes along with time.

4. Eventually build something to the stage where we too can have a charity, that supports ectopic pregnancy sufferers. I believe we are a class all of our own, we lost our babies yes....but the cherry on top is we almost lost ourselves and we don't think about that when we see that "big fat positive" do we?

We do now.......after an ectopic pregnancy its only natural. Just like the fears, anxieties and the loneliness. Its all natural, yet I had no one in Australia to tell me that.

It felt as though when i checked out of hospital I was handed a shovel, and sent on my way. Out into that mean world that tried to bump me off 6 months into my marriage and leaving my 4 yr old son motherless.I armed myself with that shovel and proceeded to dig myself a  hole that I intended to bury all of my resentment and anger and anxiety. Its hard to know how big to dig this hole when you don't have anyone there to support you, and before I knew it my hole was so big,so dark and so cold that no one could see me anymore, and it became a pit....of depression.

I didn't need a shovel....I needed a hand. A hand to guide me, to point to all the goodness in me, to pat me on the back and make me recognise just how strong I was to survive.

Don't tell me that "I'm Lucky", don't tell me" I'm okay" and don't tell me to "get over it" It doesn't help it just makes me feel more isolated and it hurts. It hurts a lot and it keeps hurting. No one told me that either. There is a lot of stuff we aren't told in Australia when we have an ectopic pregnancy, and I really want that to change.

We need it to change.


Please let me know your thoughts.


Think pink

Janey